Mint Juleps and the Stay at Home Mom (or Dad)

“There are some people who want to lean in. There are some people who want to lean back and be on a rocking chair drinking a mint julep.”

Yep, this is the latest attack on SAHM’s.  Sadly, this one came from a “republican”, Ana Navarro on Meet the Press over the weekend.

It is now almost 10:15.  I have made breakfast on two different occasions.  I am on my second load of laundry, I have read three books, hung some crayon art, and am presently getting ready for some finger painting.  I will need to make some lunches, pick someone up from school about an hour after that.  Then I will have snack time and listen to all the adventures that went on in school today.   Two play dates will follow the snacks.  My kitchen floor is a mess and must be cleaned today (I hope anyway).  Grocery shopping must be done before dinner if I want to eat.  I have dishes that need to be put away, fold the laundry, put it away, take the dog out for her walk (which I try to make at least a mile, she is a big dog and needs a great deal of exercise).   I will have a few more stories to read before the day is over, bath times, a dinner to make, a birthday cake to bake for tomorrow, a church meeting to attend, a blog to keep up with, a man that I need pay attention to as well.   Oh yeah, I have yet to make the beds, I am still somewhat getting a new house in order, three handwritten thank you notes to write; I guess I have a stop at the post office to make too!  The flower beds need some tending, I had the windows opened last night to save a little money on the electric bill, so the chances are good I have to wipe off the window sills; allergies.  

She then went on to slam the even smaller community of  the SAHD:

When I say in my house that I want to be a kept woman, the answer I get back is I want to be a kept man. So, you know, that`s not working — it`s not working in my house.

A kept woman?  That is what she thinks I am.  I looked up recently the costs of what I do every day.  It is about $60K per year.  Personally I think that is very low.   I think I am being way underpaid, but I don ‘t mind.  This is what I CHOOSE to do.  I am not being forced, I am not doing this against my will, nor do I put other women who make other choices down.  Some families simply cannot afford for a parent to stay home.  Some women put a great deal of time into getting an education (I graduated from an Ivy League school by the way) and decide not to put that on hold while raising their children.

I know plenty of single mothers who have done an incredible job raising their kids.  One of my high school friends has two kids in college now and they both are honor students, very motivated, happy, healthy, well-adjusted young adults figuring out their place in the world.  I also know people who had stay at home moms are very troubled.  There is no one way to guarantee your children will grow up to be well-adjusted adults, but virtually all studies show that children that have both parents in the home and a mother who stays at home statistically will do better.

Wanting to give that best chance to my children doesn’t make me lazy or someone who is sitting in a rocking chair drinking day after day.  It well past time that women stop putting down other women and their choices they make for their familes.

stay at home mom