Apparently Virginity is A High-Priced Commodity – 28-Year-Old Auctioning Off Her “First Time”

Isn’t it romantic?  Placing and ad online to find someone to pay you for the privilege of taking your virginity.  I mean isn’t that what romance novels are made of?  I wish I thought of it.

A 28-year-old medical student has done just that.  She says she is an “experienced” virgin and if you would like to be the first one all you have to do is pay her for it.  So far the high bid is at $550,000.  So that is what it is worth these days.  Good to know.

Her real name has not been released, but she says she is Virgin Whore and the man who eventually takes her virginity doesn’t need to worry about her not having experience.  But she will submit to a medical exam to prove her virginity.  I suppose that means she engages in other sex acts but just has not had vaginal intercourse.

Does the “winner” of the auction get to ask if her rectal area has been untouched as well?  Maybe that is the type of virgin he is looking for.  Many heterosexuals enjoy anal sex.

She doesn’t see a problem with this as she believes that prostitution should be decriminalized and should not have the stigma most people associate with it.  Her moral code is as follows:

“founded on a world of education and human emotion.”

Another words, if it feels good do it.  To heck with the consequences.  I would like to know if she plans on having this man submit to medical testing for STD’s?  If she is an “experienced” virgin, she could very well already have some form of a STD.  You don’t have to have intercourse to get many of them.  I am not even sure that HIV transmission requires intercourse, although I am no expert on these matters.

Seriously, what if everyone in the world used this as the guide to morality?  Sometimes human emotions get the better of us; we kill, we commit adultery, and all kinds of other acts in the name of emotion.  I have always thought part of morality was to overcome your all to human emotions at times and still do what is right for yourselves, others, and society as a whole?  Am I wrong about that?  I guess so.  Just do it if your being guided by your emotions.

I suppose if the emotions struck, I could walk up to this woman and slap her silly for giving away her virginity for money, and it would be perfectly acceptable and moral.  Well alrighty then.

Another thing I find fascinating is how men from all over the world are placing really high bids for the opportunity to be with a virgin.  Doesn’t that tell you something ladies?

We have lost our moral compass as a society.  We become more depraved as each day passes.

Your body is not a commodity that can be bought and sold on the open market, well at least it should not be.  This comes down to how you value yourself.  I think she really needs to have a physician heal thy self moment.

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Just in Case You Were Unclear of Rachel Canning’s Motives – 18 Year Old Suing Her Parents Speaks

Oh my.  Ms. Rachel posted this on her Facebook fan page.  Education for Rachel.

“Suburban baby boomer types are the spoiled lot, they make massive amount of money a year, they are used to flying to luxury destinations when they want, and buy things that they don’t need, people should be inclined to see things Rachel’s way.  We have been stunned by the financial greed of modern parents who are more concerned with retiring into some fantasy world rather than provide for their children’s college and young adult years. In today’s economy there are no more meaningful jobs and without family help it’s usually military or bust. We see parents like this every day, children were always an accessory to them and nothing more, once that accessory grew up and went out of fashion, much like a marriage that people allegedly commit to, the child becomes a throwaway, that’s just how it is.”

Really?  How dare parents save for retirement?  What kind of monsters are they?  Go ahead and read the page, it is all me, me, me, and more me.  She talks about herself in the third person.

She may have legal standing with her college fund as they are usually set up in the child’s name, but apparently that isn’t enough for this young woman.  She wants 100% of education funded.  It just amazes that the adults in her life are funding not only this behavior, but this mindset.  What are these parents teaching their own children?  I guess if one of this family’s kids commits a crime they can use the Affluenza defense.

I do have one question for Ms. Rachel, if there are no more meaningful jobs why bother to spend the money on an education, you can just then sue for your family to support the rest of your life, right?  Oh yeah, you want to party for a few years.

Don’t Shame Me For My Porn Career – I’m Paying for College

A student known only as Lauren (not her real name) is a porn star and student at Duke University.  She uses the proceeds of her career choice to pay tuition.  She believes that she will leave Duke University with a good education, ready for law school, and be debt free.  Good for her on being debt free.

The problem has become that someone on campus saw on of her “films” and has outed her as a porn star.  She feels she is now being bullied for her choice.  She tried waitressing, but apparently that didn’t work out as well for her:

“I worked as a waitress as a job for a year in high school,” Lauren told Duke’s student newspaper, The Chronicle. “Not only did it interfere with my school where I was barely sleeping and wasn’t doing my work, but I also was making $400 a month after taxes.”

She also found working as a waitress humiliating.

“I felt like I was being degraded and treated like s***,” Lauren said.

I don’t know, I managed to waitress/bartend my way through college and never felt degraded.  Where are going as a society that a college freshman feels that being a waitress is more demeaning that taking your clothes off for a rough sex porn site?  That is the better alternative?  

“For me, shooting pornography brings me unimaginable joy. When I finish a scene, I know that I have done so and completed an honest day’s work. It is my artistic outlet, my love, my happiness, my home,”

How often is she tested for STD’s?  That is something that you don’t need to take into consideration when you are working as a waitress.  At least that was not my experience.

Sexually transmitted diseases are highly prevalent in the pornography industry. Among 825 porn performers screened in 2000–2001, 7.7% of females and 5.5% of males had Chlamydia and 2% overall had gonorrhea. Dr. Sharon Mitchell confirms the STD prevalence in an interview with Court TV, in which she states: “66% of porn performers have Herpes, 12-28% have sexually transmitted diseases and 7% have HIV.”

Well if that isn’t something that should bring joy to your life, I don’t know what is.  Oh, but it gets better.  This from a male porn star:

“Drugs are a major, major problem in my business. Anyone who says otherwise is lying to you. I can’t tell you the number of girls who have disappeared and dropped out of the business because of their drug problems. It is unbelievably sad to think about, and seeing some of them fall into a downward spiral hurts me more than others. But I think we all can agree that a huge majority of drug users will never change unless they get professional help. I have seen all manner of drugs on set, at parties, in cars, everywhere. If I had to guess, I would put marijuana use at 90 percent of ALL people involved in the industry (performers, directors, crew, agents, drivers, owners, office workers, etc.). I have been on a set where a girl has passed out during a sex scene with me (she was abusing oxycontin). Just recently a girl overdosed on GHB (a party drug that is a clear odorless drug that doesn’t mix well with alcohol) on set. I have seen a girl win a prestigious AVN Award, not show up to accept the award, and then fall into the throes of drug use that caused her to lose at least 50 pounds and drop off the face of the earth. Why is drug use so prevalent in our business? Well, let’s figure that out. First of all, remember that the business is populated largely with girls aged 18-21. And the majority of those girls are uneducated (many haven’t graduated high school). Add to that the fact that many come into the business because they have no money and are working at menial jobs like fast food places. So you have young girls who are uneducated with very little money entering the business.

We can now move onto the violence in the industry.  Now, I have never seen a porn film, but I would assume that most of the violence is generated towards women.

Former pornographic performer Alex Devine shares her violent experience and writes:

“Donkey Punch was the most brutal, depressing, scary scene that I have ever done. I have tried to block it out of my memory due to the severe abuse I received during the filming. The guy, Steve French, has a natural hatred towards women in the sense that he has always been known to be more brutal than EVER needed. I agreed to do the scene thinking it was less beating, except the ‘punch’ in the head. If you noticed, Steve had worn his solid gold ring the entire time, and continued to punch me with it. I actually stopped the scene while it was being filmed because I was in too much pain.”

There is a very heavy emphasis on rougher, more sadistic sex, with slapping, spitting, violent hair-pulling and scenes of extremely abusive hardcore sex acts. In one film, the man forces the woman’s head into a toilet during the final scene, a technique that seems to help him achieve climax.

Just lovely.

From Australia:

A recent University of Sydney study, in which two professors surveyed more than 800 men, found that excessive porn consumption was reported by almost half the respondents (85 per cent of whom were married or in a relationship), and was harming their professional success and relationships.

The numbers were dramatic: 47  per cent of the male subjects watched between 30 minutes to three hours of porn per day, one in three said it harmed their work efforts, and one in five would rather watch porn than have sex with their partners.

So Lauren, do you still want to believe that you are just being free and enjoying your “kink”?  What you are doing is adding to the misery of people all over the world.  You are complaisant in the act.  She says she doesn’t like the whole virgin/whore dichotomy that goes on at Duke University.  Ok, that may very well be a problem.  But is men viewing the violent nature porn that you star in helping with that?  I have this feeling it is actually adding to it, not solving the problem.

From feminist Naomi Wolf:

Young women tell me that hair-pulling, and even pressure around the neck at orgasm, are normal parts of courtship sex these days. These are ‘porn cliches’, as one young woman put it. I am not surprised by these shifts because  we all know about the pornification of society.

I believe more voices would be speaking out if the new research on this issue were better understood. What we’re not being told – and this is a view which many scientists now confirm, but too few ordinary people understand – is that porn use poses health problems.

Porn actually promotes the notion that women are sex objects.  It doesn’t cure it.  Your little money-making venture dear Lauren is robbing more and more young women of real experiences of what sex should really be about.  Two people coming together to enjoy each other.  Instead, we now have a generation of people who don’t see mystery in sex.  They don’t see it as something that is to be enjoyed between two consenting adults in a relationship based on mutual love and respect, but nothing more than scratching an itch.

Lauren was also upset by the one of the papers who interviewed her noticing that she had a very expensive designer handbag as part of her new-found riches from her job.  Yes, she may be making good money.  Yes, she may graduate law school debt free (her career goal after getting a pre-law degree from Duke).  Yes, she is far from the only one who has chosen this path in order to pay the bills during college.  But, don’t be surprised years from now that you can’t have children due to the STD’s you received.  Don’t be surprised that many a decent man will not be willing to marry or raise a child with someone with this past.  Don’t be surprised if you fall into a deep depression when you a woman tells you how your films shattered her marriage.  Remember Christie Brinkley’s very public divorce?  Someone was starring in those porn films her ex-husband was watching.

You keep doing what you’re doing because you don’t want to demeaned by being a waitress.  It is really not that big of a deal.  The “bullying” is really the least of the issues your career choice will bring to your life.

Feminist Blogger Now In Fear – Men May Have Discovered That We Are On To Them

A “radical feminist” blogger wrote a post a while back on how all “Penis in Vagina” or PIV intercourse is rape.  Of course myself and others who read this dribble rebutted and or made fun of the post.  Well, that caused more traffic at her blog.  Most bloggers are happy to get additional traffic.  Isn’t the entire point of writing these posts is getting others to read them?  Not in her case.

When men view our blogs in such large numbers, it’s a threat. They’re not just looking at it, they view it with the intent of harming radical feminists and women in general. They do it to collect information so they know what next to do to prevent women from going there. They batter radfem work in public for all women to see and show the result of their verbal and written battering as an example of what will await women if they do, think or say the same. They write nasty and threatening comments, that in order to trash, I have to read at least a few words of. Even though it doesn’t hurt my feelings, they are still harmful and inevitably affect my thoughts.

How exactly does she know the gender of the those making the hits?  I need to update my analytics, I don’t these type of break-downs immediately.  Anyhoo, at least some are men.  Those men are hateful beasts that only want to destroy.

85,000, that’s the maximum number of views I had in one day a couple of weeks ago when the liberals and MRAs circulated my PIV blogpost for punishment. Unlike a normal blogger, attracting 85,000 hits isn’t something I want to celebrate. It’s threatening: you know they’re after you, it only means you’ve hit men’s radar and you have no idea what they plan to do. Will they attempt to hack into my blog? Will they try to find info about me? The kinds of thought this leads me to is 85,000 men going after me in real life. Probably a bit less if you discount the women. If that happened, how on earth could I hide from tens of thousands of men?

There is no denying there is a whole lot of crazy out there, but hey isn’t this type of talk adding to it?  I mean does she really believe that men are worried about her getting the word out that having intercourse is rape that they want to silence her?  We. Must. Not. Let. This. Out.  She must be stopped at all costs.  She is letting out their little secret.  They only want intercourse to subjugate us.  We are nothing without them and they must be allowed to continue to rule the world.  Oh my.

All this is gaslighting and bullying, men’s lies are meant to sound convincing. They convince with the use of force, ordering me to comply to their view by using an authoritarian, terrorising tone. ‘How dare you see otherwise. You’re crazy. You’re a bully. Etc.’ Which is why it works so well to instil self-doubt because it’s a mindfuck, it’s thought-blocking, it’s also an assault and it creates fear and willingness to appease to avoid further assaults. Brainwashing works through a mix of mind assaults, terror and constant repetition of a same message until it’s hammered into our brain, which is psychological violence. 85,000 views and hundreds of trolling comments is in effect a blitzkrieg brainwashing attack by men and male-colonised women. Hundreds of men and their pawns attempting to reprogram the minds of deviant female bloggers, women who don’t comply and who break through men’s myths and lies.

It’s interesting that Cathy Brennan’s response to the whole thing led a commenter, Tracy, to comment about what it meant on reformism: I hadn’t framed it in that way (see discussion here, here and here). I’ve been thinking about it for a while but haven’t had the time to comment on it properly so I’ll continue my thoughts in this post. Tracy defined CB’s post as reformist to the extent that CB doesn’t name the agent, that is why men isolating us from one another is so dangerous, why it’s so important to huddle together in this circumstance [because men are waiting in line to rape and kill us]. CB asks us to take safety measures against a threat -men- that she won’t name, and at the same time treats men as an audience to appease, as if they would take note and change their behaviour accordingly. Tracy named that gaslighting because it’s acting as if two opposites (truth vs. omission/lie; threat vs. safety) were the same. Of course it’s not CB’s fault because she herself is victim of it.

Men are waiting in line to rape and kill us?  Really?  I have never seen nor heard of such a line.  May I make a suggestion, if such a line exists outside of your home, move.  My neighborhood is quite safe.  No men actively trying to rape you on a daily basis around.

I get that most women that call themselves a “feminist” call this thinking silly.  The problem is that this is the logical conclusion to that thinking.  Men are bad.  Women are victims.  Women are treated so unfairly that the government must step in to  protect them.  If the entire belief system is based on that women are tough enough and smart enough to be like just like men why in the world would you need the government to step in?

Life will never be fair nor will women and men ever be totally equal.  There are differences between men and women that just are.  Most men are stronger.  Our upper body strength isn’t what there is.  Of course there are women who are stronger than men, but generally speaking that isn’t the case.  There was just a scientific study released that our brains are hardwired differently.  It shows up in the scans. We are built this way.  It is biological.

What really gets my goat about feminism is the fact that the majority of the work for women and “fairness” is done in the industrialized west.  If they spend the majority of their time talking about how in some cultures the physical abuse of women is not only commonplace, but perfectly acceptable it would be different.  In some countries, such as Afghanistan, women were beaten in public for having one strand of hair showing.  The same still happens in Iran.  Some women are not allowed to work.  To heck with the fact that their husband or main provider has been killed or is missing for any reason, she still is not allowed to get a job to support herself.  At least not without the threat of jail, physical abuse, up to and including the threat of death.  I don’t hear these topics being discussed much in the world of feminism.

Feminism also makes great assumptions about men that I take issue with.  Why do these women think that men don’t feel bad about working long hours and being away from their children?  Do they think that they don’t care that they miss the school plays?  Do they honestly believe that men don’t get wanky when the house needs work?  It is assumed that they don’t feel overwhelmed by a weekend of yard work, soccer games, shopping, and whatever else their particular chores end up being.  I am sorry but I find that very hard to believe.

I know plenty of men who feel just as overwhelmed as women do when it comes to using their time most efficiently to get everything they want done accomplished.  I also know men who are stay at home dads, so it is their job to clean, to cook, to do laundry, and whatever else needs to be done around the house all the while taking care of the kids.  It is simply a silly assertion that men don’t feel the same type of things that women do.  We all feel a certain amount of guilt in our lives.  We all question our choices from time to time.  I don’t think I have ever met a parent, male or female, that doesn’t wonder if they could have done certain things differently.  That don’t dwell, even temporarily, on the mistakes that we all make when raising children.  They don’t come with a handbook, it is trial by fire.  That is especially true with the first one.

 Just because we make different choices in many instances it doesn’t mean that men don’t have the same type of emotions that women do.  One of the main differences is that men tend to keep these things to themselves.  They don’t dwell on them in the same way that some women tend to do.   Many men look at this as part of life and complaining about it makes them “less manly”.   Men deal with them differently, that doesn’t mean that they don’t feel it.  That is what feminism today says.  That somehow men are emotionless and guilt free.  They live lives that they actively believe makes them superior to women.  A very silly and uncaring assertion.

 

Mental Illness Cuts Another Life Short – Phillip Seymour Hoffman Dead

Phillip Seymour Hoffman was found dead from overdosing on drugs Sunday morning.  He was found with a needle still in his arm.  On the surface it is easy to say “so what”.  He was just another actor who had fame and fortune who threw it all away with the selfish use of drugs.  A theme that is all too common when these things happen.  

But the truth is his problems started long before he was either.  The truth also is that his battle with depression had been ongoing for most of his adult life.  He went to rehab for the first time in his early twenties right after college.  So his problems had nothing at all to do with being rich or famous.  His problems had to do with the fact he was human.  He had the same frailties that all the rest of us have.  We all have issues.  We all have things we wish could change, do differently, react differently to, be better.  

Mental illness isn’t something to mess around with.  It isn’t something that will just “go away” in time.  It is a medical condition, not unlike high blood pressure or diabetes, that requires medical attention.  In some cases it requires medication, in others talk therapy will work just fine.  But in either event it is a medical condition.  

I was watching Hannity on Fox News last night.  Something I rarely do, as he isn’t one of my favorites.  Last night he reminded me of why.  He was showing pictures of the last few days and/or weeks of Mr. Seymour’s life.  The pictures were from another “news” organization that I avoid like the plaque, TMZ.  It is nothing more than an exploitative gossip organization that seems to get off on the tragedies of others.  I am not sure how much money they paid for the pictures, and for my own mental well being I am better off not knowing.  

Have your opinions on what drug addicts are, that is fine.  If you believe they deserve what they get, OK.  I will get to how you are wrong about that shortly, but that is your opinion.  But remember, famous people have families as well.  He had a long time girlfriend and three young children; Cooper, Tallulah, and Willa.  The youngest being only five years old.  These young children just lost their father.  

I grew up with parent with a substance abuse problem.  It is certainly isn’t the easiest of childhoods.  It is downright painful in fact.  Which his relapse back into to the addiction cycle may have been part of the reasons that he was separated from his long time girlfriend.  That isn’t something that is really any of our business in any event.  That is between him, her, and their children.  But that doesn’t make the love they felt for their father any less than that of your children towards you or your love towards your parents.  They deserve time to mourn in private without the people from the cheap seats chiming in on how he deserved what he got because he was a no good addict.  

As I have stated mental illness is just that, an illness.  It isn’t as simple as going to the doctor, getting a blood test, and be given a treatment that will help control or cure it.  For many, such as myself, it is a life-long struggle that requires care.  Care from others and care from myself towards myself.  It is very easy to say well people like this are selfish when their lives end in a tragedy such as a drug overdose or suicide.  The reality is far different.  

Drugs and mental illness are very closely related.  As I said it requires care.  Sometimes that care comes in the form of self-medicating.  It becomes the way to feel better, just for a moment.  One moment in time that you don’t feel bad.  You don’t feel that the entire world is closing in around you.  For many, which I firmly believe that my father was one of these people, the stigma of mental illness is far worse than self-medicating.  Being a drunk, an IV drug user, a pill popper, a snorter or whatever else your drug of choice may be is the better option.  It is easier.  

Dealing with a mental illness is painful and it is work, very hard work in fact.  You are surrounded by a society that doesn’t even make the attempt to understand what you are dealing with.  You are just labeled.  You may as well just be the addict.  

As a society it is well past time that we start dealing with these issues.  Virtually every mass shooting in this country has roots in mental illness.  Our jail and/or prison system contains a very large amount of mentally ill people, almost half in fact.  The number is estimated to be about 48%.  Nearly one-third of our homeless are mentally ill.  We spend the money on the back end housing and feeding these people in our jails and homeless shelters.  Yet we do very little to help them avoid those pitfalls and get the medical help that they need.  Just in terms of dollars and cents, it makes far more sense to spend that money on the front end.  Because we are spending it.  That can not be denied, at least not honestly.

We stigmatize them.  We tell ourselves that people like Mr. Hoffman was just a selfish man who had fame and fortune who was too weak to stay away from powerful drugs.  We tell ourselves that the parents of these young shooters should have done more to help their children.  We tell ourselves these things because it is easier than looking at ourselves and saying we too are to blame.  We could do more a society, we just would rather not because if we did, we may have to look at ourselves and our frailties.  We would have to look at our families and admit there may be a problem.  It is far easier this way.  We will just label them, call them weak.  Nothing to see here folks, just move along.  

Rest in Peace, Mr. Hoffman.  I hope that you rest easier than you lived.  Your talent will be missed.  

Apparently, In Canada Killing Your Children is Not That Big of a Deal – 2 Newborn Deaths 36 Months in Prison

A young animal woman kills two out of the three children she gives birth to and will spend only 36 months in prison.  She served 18 months before bail was granted and will now serve an additional 18 months.  She has given birth four times since 2008.  Two babies were never found after she put them in dumpsters.  One child was saved from the dumpster when a man, who turns out to be the child’s father, heard cries and saved the child.  A fourth child was birthed during her time in prison.

“You co-operated with police. Without your admission to police about the first babies, there would be no case against you.”

The judge also noted that Borowiec has shown “genuine remorse.”

Genuine remorse?  This is a woman who did this three times.  Not once, not twice, but three times.  Gave birth to these innocent, helpless children into a toilet, then wrapped them in towels after hearing their cries, put them in garbage bags and disposed of them like they were trash.  How does one show remorse for that?  Do you cry a great deal?  By her own admission she never even bothered to check if these children were male or female.  She cared not one whit about these babies.

I am not sure if it is a good or bad thing that she isn’t trying to say she didn’t know she was pregnant.  She knowingly lied to people about her condition by saying she had cysts in her uterus.  She never told the baby’s father about them.  She never sought medical attention for the prenatal care for these children.  She then says it was after giving birth that she wasn’t “normal”.

This reminds me of another case in Canada where the young mother was given little to no  jail time because “abortion on demand” is the law of the land there.  They have little to no restrictions on abortion.  Apparently as long as you are not in active labor, you can end the life of your child.  That judge seems to think that includes the time right after birth and the child is outside the womb.

Is it any wonder that we don’t respect life?  Why get angry that there are so many murders on the streets of Chicago?  What makes them more human than these children?  When a society has gotten to the point where it no longer cares that life has been ended at the hand of another, it is a society that deserves whatever else comes.

A Night at The Grammy’s

While this is a little late to the party, I have been seeing all the talk of what went on at The Grammy Awards on Sunday night.  Satanic rituals performed onstage by a woman who was raised in a Christian conservative home, the mass wedding performed by Queen Latifa, and Jay-Z and Beyoncé performing Drunk in Love together on stage.

I don’t really expect anything different from Katy Perry.  It has been obvious for quite some time that she has rejected the values that her parents believe in.  That is her prerogative.  What I find insulting about it is the fact that she feels the need to publicly mock it, doing so in front of the artists who were there to see if they won awards for Gospel and Christian categories.  At least one artist got up and walked out.  Ms. Perry has the right to live her life anyway she chooses to do so, but somehow I have this feeling that she really isn’t a devil worshipper and that wasn’t done to get her own particular point of view across.  It was done to make people who are questioning their own belief systems to feel ashamed that they may have the audacity to think that Christianity is a good thing.  A person who is firmly set in a Christian lifestyle may be insulted by the performance, but they don’t question their belief.  They simply shake their heads in disbelief and dismay.

Queen Latifa, and ordained minister of some kind, performed a marriage ceremony for 30 or so couples.  Some of these couples were of course same-sex couples.  Now, I would say this if all the couples were heterosexual.  The Grammy Awards is no place to get married.  This wasn’t about making a lifetime commitment to another, it was about proving a political point.  That gay couples love just as much as same-sex couples.  I have never said they didn’t.  A wedding and/or marriage ceremony is about is two people making a commitment to each other; for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, to remain faithful and loving for the rest of your lives.  Most people do decide to celebrate that commitment in front of their families and loved ones.  Others do it more privately.  The vast majority of people don’t decide to do it because they want to the world to see their political viewpoint.  That makes a mockery of the thing that gay marriage advocates say that they are trying to accomplish.  Simple equality and the right to commit themselves to a person that they love.  What is so odd about it is that some of the lyrics that were being played out that night even talked about how marriage is more than a simple piece of paper.  If you want equality than stop acting like everyone in the world must approve of your marriage.  I have news for you, not everyone approves of all kinds of marriages.  There have been marriages that have been looked down upon since the beginning of marriage and that isn’t likely to end anytime soon.  You don’t need to me to like what your choices are in order for them to be the right choice for you.  I am never going to approve of gay marriage and that doesn’t make your feelings and your commitment any less valid in your own life.  My religious beliefs tells me that it is wrong.  The sooner the activists get that the better off we will all be.  But of course, that would hinge upon it really being about just marriage, when for many it is not.

Now we can move on to Jay-Z and his lovely bride Beyoncé.  She was prancing around on stage barely dressed and moving her body in a salacious manner singing a song that included the lyrics “I can’t keep my fingers off it baby, I want you”.  You know, I don’t really need to know what goes in the bedroom of any other couple.  I really don’t.  It isn’t something that interests me at all.  I have read two opposing views of this performance.  One from the very left leaning Think Progress that is basically saying that conservatives should jump at the chance of having this couple be the spokesmodels for marriage, because they make it look like fun.

This may not be the vision of marriage conservatives intended to try to promote. And it’s absolutely a more aspirational, exciting good than the idea that marriage will discipline wayward men or provide support for women who can’t manage economically on their own. But if conservatives want to sell Americans on marriage, maybe they have to talk more about the bliss half of wedded bliss, to think about the desire part of making marriage desirable. And maybe the entertainment industry that Douthat’s singled out as the enemy of marriage has something to add to the case for marital happiness. If marriage is a product that conservatives desperately want to sell, the smartest thing they could do right now is to hire Beyoncé and Jay-Z as a product spokescouple.

Now I am far from the spokesperson for every conservative nor do I pretend to be an expert on marriage.  But I can think of no conservative that thinks that sex within the realms of a marriage is bad.  After all conservatives, especially of the social variety, tend to have much larger families.  Something must be going on in order for those babies to be coming along.  The difference is that we don’t like talking about it publicly nor do we think that it is appropriate viewership for our young children for a scantily dressed woman making provocative movements while using euphemisms about a surf board.  I also am unclear of the conservative message that women should get married because they can’t manage on their own.  Now the data is clear, the majority of children living in poverty are products of a single family home.  When you are married before you have children the chances of those children living below the poverty line decreases and not just a little.  That doesn’t mean that conservatives are saying that women should get married simply because they need a man to support them.  You have a 70% chance of lifting yourself out of poverty if you follow three very simple things, graduate high school, do not get married before the age of 21, and do not have children out-of-wedlock.  The left leaning Brookings Institute didn’t like these findings, but the finding are there nonetheless.  That is a far cry from saying that you must marry in order to support yourselves as women.  There are plenty of women who can support themselves and their children financially without the help of man, but that doesn’t mean that they give a strong base for that child.  Two active parents is better for children to thrive.

I am not going to get into passing judgement on the marriage of that supercouple.  That is something that is between them.  He knew she was performer when he married her and apparently he has no issues with the whole “sex sells” part of her job.  He is obviously fine with it so it isn’t up to me to say that it is wrong in all instances.  What I don’t like is that being told that is what I am supposed to aspire to.  Sorry, but no.  In my relationship there isn’t a great deal of jealousy going on, thank God.  But somehow I don’t think that me shaking my ass in a barely there outfit is part of the long-term game plan for a happy and successful relationship.  It also isn’t the best role model for young children either.  But that is just some prudish conservative talking.

 

An Open Letter to Amy Glass

Amy Glass, who I am assuming is a feminist, wrote a blog post entitled I look down on Young Women With Husbands and Kids and I’m Not Sorry.  Now, I think that she and I agree that not every person, whether it be man or woman should become a spouse, let alone a parent.  Neither of these tasks are easy and some people just don’t have the capabilities of doing it well.  She seems to think that getting married and having children is the easiest thing in the world:

 Having kids and getting married are considered life milestones. We have baby showers and wedding parties as if it’s a huge accomplishment and cause for celebration to be able to get knocked up or find someone to walk down the aisle with. These aren’t accomplishments, they are actually super easy tasks, literally anyone can do them. They are the most common thing, ever, in the history of the world. They are, by definition, average. And here’s the thing, why on earth are we settling for average?

If these things were so easy why do we see the skyrocketing rates of people using dating sites and fertility clinics?  Yes, it is the easiest thing in the world to go out and date and find that person who actually makes your life feel more complete.  The person you can be totally honest with, even when you know they aren’t going to like what you have to say is the easiest thing in the world to find.  I mean just open up your front door and the lines of people to choose from is a massive one.

I would love for her to go and say that to woman who has health problems that make it impossible for her to conceive.  Go talk to the couples who spend virtually their entire life savings to have fertility treatments to make the dream of being a parent come true and see what they have to say.  Once they get done slapping her silly they may have calmed down enough to laugh in her face.  Getting pregnant would seem like an easy task, but for many it is Mission Impossible.  Go sit with a woman who is doing everything under the sun to get pregnant when her period arrives and watch the tears and the feelings of inadequacy that she haunted by. Talk to a man who finds out his swimmers don’t do the job that God and biology intended them to do.  Many men that I know that are having problems conceiving don’t want to get tested, even though the test for the man is much more simple, straightforward, and far less invasive.

Go and talk to the woman who does want to be married and have a family but is in her thirties and tell her it is an easy task that “literally anyone can do them”.  Some people who remain unmarried aren’t that way by choice.  That is their reality and they eventually make the best of it, or one would hope.  Many married couples that don’t have children, aren’t childless by choice.  That is the fate they were dealt and become the best Aunties and Uncles that they can be to their siblings and friends kids.

  You will never have the time, energy, freedom or mobility to be exceptional if you have a husband and kids.

What makes her think that women without a husband and children are exceptional?  I work with a woman who was never married nor did she have children.  She works two jobs and barely supports herself.  She is on public assistance in the form of food stamps.  She is bitter woman who is angry, especially when she says out loud that most of her problems she created for herself with the choices she made in life.  The simple act of not getting married and becoming a parent isn’t an automatic entry into the world of exceptionalism.

Is a woman who gives up  on the idea of marriage and family to become a professional woman automatically exceptional?  Say this woman is the VP of marketing for some large international firm and is really good at her job but has no family to share this with as she ages more exceptional than the stay at home mom who raised a child to become one of those teachers.  You know the one that I am talking about.  The teacher that really affects a child and helps that child see something in themselves that they wouldn’t have otherwise.  We all had that teacher.  I know in my case I had several.  The most remarkable thing about that teacher is that they didn’t just give that light to one child, they gave it to many.  One of my high school reunions just recently passed, I am not going to say which one, but one of my “that teacher” attended the get together.  Just judging by the people who hugged him and the amount of photos taken of him that splashed across my Facebook page the next day shows it wasn’t just me that looked at him as “that teacher”.  He helped hundreds, if not thousands, of young adults feel better about themselves and find their own way in the world.  Isn’t the woman who put the energy into raising such a man just as exceptional?  I say yes she is.

Obviously Ms. Glass has no children.  Otherwise she would never with a straight face say that it is easy.  Child rearing is one of the hardest jobs in the world.  You worry that every little thing that you do is going to influence them (which in most cases is true) and you second guess the choices that you make when something goes wrong.  I would love to see her try to comfort a small child that is feeling ill, especially when the older sibling is in the other room pulling all the toilet paper off the roll while you are attending to the child that wants nothing else but the comfort of mommy due to a fever or cold.

I have strong feelings that children should have a stay at home parent if at all possible.  I have no issue with a man being that parent that stays at home, if that is what works better for that particular family.  I am a realist, I understand perfectly well that it isn’t always an option.  Life doesn’t always work out that way.  Nor do I dismiss that fact that many women today want to work even if they could financially stay at home.  They feel they are a better parent by going out into the world and being productive at a job and bringing home at least part of the family income.  I do happen to believe it is best for the child to have a parent who is involved in the life of the child.  But I also understand that not all stay at home parents are good ones.  It all comes down to putting the work and the effort into raising a child to become a happy and productive adult.  That is something that can be done in a variety of ways and there is no one “right” way.  Every child is an individual and has their own needs that don’t necessarily line up with the needs of other families.

But it is more than just a little insulting to hear another woman say that children and marriage is what keeps you from being exceptional.  For some people being exceptional is nothing more than being the best possible parent and the person who always had a clean home that was ready for anyone that dropped by.

I also must ask is the women who clean homes for a living lacking in the exceptional department as well?  After all they aren’t doing much of anything according to this logic.  I guess they are just serfs who live to make the exceptional women such as she is lives a little easier so they can spend their energy being exceptional at their much more important jobs.  Seriously, how elitist is this woman?  There is no other way to take her little post other than a person who cleans homes is loser.

 I hear women talk about how “hard” it is to raise kids and manage a household all the time. I never hear men talk about this. It’s because women secretly like to talk about how hard managing a household is so they don’t have to explain their lack of real accomplishments. Men don’t care to “manage a household.” They aren’t conditioned to think stupid things like that are “important.”

Feminists seem to have this real disconnect when it comes to men.  That somehow they don’t feel the guilt and they don’t question what they are doing and how it affects their families.  Many men who travel a great deal with their jobs feel just as guilty that they aren’t there for their kids.  They don’t like missing virtually every soccer game.  They also seem to have this disconnect that children don’t feel like something is missing from their lives because their dads are too busy working to have time for the little things that matter to them.  I guess those little goals and events that kids feel are important aren’t exceptional enough for Ms. Glass.

My brother, who grew up with a father that didn’t attend games or pretty much anything else, promised himself he would be a different kind of dad.  He has three boys that were all active in sports while they were growing up.  He rarely missed a practice, let alone a game.  My eldest nephew would sometimes get crazy over the fact that his father was “always around”.  This kid also went to a private Catholic school.  He was involved with church group within the school.  One of the exercises they did in this group was to have the kids sit face to face and tell the other kid what they envied about them.  One of the kids told my nephew how jealous he was that his father was always at the games.  You see his father was an executive with some big corporation that required long hours and travel.  Yes, those kids had financial advantages that my nephew certainly didn’t have, as my brother is on a much more limited budget, but what he got in return was time.  Which is really more exceptional?  I would have to say that putting the time into being the very best parent you can be as opposed to having a big house and large bank account is the far better choice.  But what do I know?  Obviously my life wouldn’t rate as exceptional.

Here’s a Nominee for Parent of the Year

Just speechless.

Hey I Know My Kid Broke the Law, But that Doesn’t Mean They Should Face Any Punishment – Parents Threaten Lawsuits over Their Childs Illegal Behavior

Brian Holloway, former NFL player and father of eight, has a vacation home in New York State.  While at his home in Florida his 19 year-old son tells him about some pictures and things he is seeing on twitter.  They were about an out of control party being held in the vacation house.  Now these kids didn’t have permission to be there, they broke in and decided to throw a big party.  Items have been stolen, they cleaned out his house of the alcohol he had in the home, they urinated on his carpeting, they spray painted his walls, destroyed hardwood flooring, and left drug paraphernalia on the property.

Brian was a long ways away trying to get a hold of the local sheriff to get these freeloaders out his home.  The sheriff did come and break up the party, which by the way they originally planned on staying for the Labor Day weekend.  The house has sustained thousands of dollars worth of damage and a yet to be determined amount loss due to stolen property.  Yet oddly, the sheriff was unable to make even one arrest.   I guess those kids were fast.  They ran and hid or something.

Brian hasn’t taken this lying down.  He has reprinted all the tweets he could find that came from his home during this drunken home invasion.  What do the parents of these young adults do?  They threaten to sue.  That’s right.  We wouldn’t want little Suzy or Johnny to be publicly humiliated now would we?  After all, most of them are high school students getting ready to fill out applications for college.  How dare someone talk about how out of control their child is?

Now Brian hasn’t accused anyone of anything.  He has only put out there tweets that these kids themselves put out on social media.  One tweet said:

yeah mom went to a party and got drunk but hey atleast I’m not a meth addict”

Emily’s mom must be so proud.

Dear Maddie was upset that the party got busted, it would have been so much bigger.  Oh no, she missed out on more fun.  That is lawsuit worthy isn’t it?  Another young man was glad that his parents don’t care what he does.  Apparently not.

Only one parent, count it, one, showed up with their child to help clean up the mess.

We are more and more becoming a society that care nothing for personal property or the rights of the others.  It is me, me, and me that matters.  While it is understandable that kids that age don’t get how hard it is to earn the money to afford a home, they should at the very least have the understand that breaking into someone’s home is wrong.  That peeing on the carpet is wrong.  That spraying painting on a the wall is wrong.  Do these young adults live in zoo where anything goes?  Would they treat their parents home in this fashion?

But what is worse is the seeming lack of remorse shown by the parents.  It seems that their little brats getting into college is a more desirable thing rather than teaching their kids a sense of responsibility.  Actually showing their children that actions have consequences.  Very real consequences in this case.  That is a lesson that no college can teach these brats.  That is the lesson that the parents alone are in charge of.  But no, they will use our legal system to bash the victim and teach their kids that hey they are special, it was just one stupid mistake.  No biggie.  Move along, nothing to see here.

Billboard of the Day

Amsterdam’s “Scum Villages”

Amsterdam has set up a housing complex that is being dubbed “Scum Village”.  It is made out of refurbished shipping containers and was constructed to hold people who exhibit “anti-social” behavior, and is supervised “police supervised”.

The mayor of Amsterdam, Eberhard E. van der Laan says:

“The family has many years of serious nuisance, and has a history of vandalism, noise, and threats. If other solutions do not work, it must be the culprit that moves, not the other families around them.”

While that sounds good on the surface, one has to wonder what constitutes anti-social behavior and who exactly it is that gets to decide when that is exhibited and what it takes to put into this special “housing”.

Isn’t this Hilteresque?

The first residents of this village are members of the Dimitrov family, part of the famed Roma Gypsies, long considered a group of people who suffer persecution.  While others tells tales of them being nothing but a bunch of grifters.  They were a group that was targeted for extermination by the Nazi’s during World War II.  Approximately 3,000 were killed in concentration camps.

Another problem with this bright idea is that it will just create an environment of groups of people who are “anti-social” all in one place.  Won’t that create a larger problem?  I mean it only makes sense that what one considers anti-social isn’t going to be what another will term the same way.  You are just going to end up with a large group of people who have already proven to be hard to live near.  Won’t that create more crime and larger problems?  It seems they are setting themselves up for an entire area of undesirable people living together and causing all kinds of problems to each other as well and anyone that has the misfortune of living any near that place.

I find it chilling that this is happening in 2013 in a city as modern as Amsterdam.  It seems that humanity is moving backwards instead of forwards and we have not learned from our mistakes.  I guess history has taught us nothing.

Government over-reach is alive and well.  So much for a city and a country that prides itself on human rights.

 

The Shaming of Mrs. Hall

I came across this blog post a few days ago and was working on a write-up about it.  Mrs. Hall is mom and she wrote an open letter to young women about the selfies that they post on social media in different stages of undress.  I never got around to hitting publish on it.  I am glad that I didn’t because of the storm that this has caused.

As usual feminists have taken a disliking to Mrs. Hall and her words.  She is slut shaming and blaming the victim for any potential sexual abuse that may come into their lives.   Now Mrs. Hall did not such thing.  Her advice was simply that maybe teenage girls should be more aware of the dangers of social media and putting half-naked pictures of yourself isn’t a good idea.

The thing that I never understood about the feminist movement is that they claim that they don’t want to be treated like a sex object they then cry foul when you point out that showing your boobs to complete strangers is exactly what makes you a sexual object to some.

From Jezebel:

“Respect everyone regardless of their gender/sexuality/appearance,” she might’ve said. “Don’t worry! It’s okay if you have sexual feelings! You’re a sexual being! Girls are too. That doesn’t mean you can treat them like objects. You and you alone are responsible for your thoughts and actions. Get over this Madonna-whore complex while you still can.”

Now what she actually said was:

I think the boys notice other things. For one, it appears that you are not wearing a bra.

I get it – you’re in your room, so you’re heading to bed, right? But then I can’t help but notice the red carpet pose, the extra-arched back, and the sultry pout.  What’s up? None of these positions is one I naturally assume before sleep, this I know.

She was commenting on how these young women are posing into positions that make them look like a sexual object in various stages of undress.

Teaching your daughters to have some modesty is not slut shaming nor is it remotely close to saying they are responsible if they happen to get raped.  It is saying to them that the most important thing that they have is themselves.  It has value and that value is incalculable.  There is no monetary thing that can replace your body, your self-respect, your emotions, and everything else that makes you human.

Now I have always said that we teach our daughters to be careful when they are out at parties where others are drinking.  That behavior can put you in danger.  It doesn’t mean that you deserve what happens to you, it means why put yourself in that position when it can be so easily avoided?  It is far less likely that young men will be raped.  But that doesn’t mean we don’t tell our sons that they should not be in those positions either.  We would should be teaching all of our children that their actions have consequences.

I have been thinking about some posts I have done in the past, the lawsuit filed by Yale students about sexual misconduct that occurred at an off campus Naked Party where people were drinking heavily.  Knock me over with a feather, I am shocked, shocked I say to hear that there was sexual misconduct going on.  That doesn’t mean that the young men involved should get a pass.  If they committed a crime they should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.  But I would use this story as a teachable moment to young women and explain that when you are in this environment and you are drinking, bad things may happen to you.  Avoid the whole thing by not going to a naked party.  I am not saying  they deserved to be raped and/or assaulted.  Young adults, drinking, and sex is not a really good combination.

But of course the feminazi’s of the world turned this into you are tempting my son to be unpure.  What she was actually trying to get across to these girls is if you don’t want to be treated like a sexual object, don’t act like one.  We are all human and sex and sexual feelings is part of our humanity.  Women and men think differently.  We just do.  Those different ways of reacting and thinking sometimes lead us to not understand the intentions of others.   This harkens me back to post about the New York Times article on Penn State and the Hook Up Culture.  A young women in that article flat-out said that if she started to sober up a little and realized she didn’t want to have sex, she would just drop to her knees and open her mouth to get it over with.  Is that rape?  No, it isn’t.  It is a young woman who made a series of bad choices that ended up with her on knees to gracefully find a way out of sex after a night of drinking.

These are the types of things that Mrs. Hall is trying to warn young women about.  You make these choices, thinking they are innocent and wont’ cause any harm, and then find yourself in a dorm room on your knees performing oral sex on a man that you don’t care about at all.  That isn’t empowerment young ladies.  You have been used for sex.  That is exactly what makes men look at you as a sexual object.  No one is saying stay a virgin until you get married.  Or at least I am not.  That is an individual choice that all of must make for our own reasons.  What people like myself and Mrs. Hall are saying is that if you act a certain way, don’t be shocked when you get treated that way.  It shouldn’t be a surprise.

Here is a funny example of what Mrs. Hall was discussing.  Please note, I don’t know how serious the injuries to the young woman was.  I hope that since the video was posted she suffered only minor burns.  But if you look closely you will see a bottle and shot glass on the table.  Someone put on that video camera.  Someone posted that video.  Please dont’ tell me that young woman didn’t wanted to be looked at as sexy, as someone you may want to hang with, dance with, most likely have sex with.  No one else made her an object except for herself.  This is what Mrs. Hall is trying to warn teenage girls about.

 

 

Hey, Want Some Advice on How to Convince a Woman to Get an Abortion? Well, Here It Is

Oh my.  I have reached the age that little should shock me.  I convince myself all the time that is the case.  Then I read this.  

It is a blog that says it is an advice like thing for men.  You know, dating tips and of course, what would it be without a column on how to get out of fatherhood?  I mean that is necessary info after all, right?

It starts out with how men have few options when it comes to birth control:

Let’s face it: sexually active people have accidents. Shit happens, that’s life. But we know that men have no reproductive rights in opting out of a being a parent. With only two birth control options available to men (a condom and a vasectomy) the words you use to get your girl off the fence about having an abortion must be well thought out.

I notice it says nothing about not having sex or even if people think that isn’t a realistic argument, it doesn’t even mention just having sex with someone who you trust enough to know that she is taking birth control on a regular basis.  Nor does it mention the withdrawal method.  If worse comes to worse, you can just have oral sex.  I guess the fact that when used properly, condoms are pretty much as effective as birth control as any method a woman uses.  But I guess that is neither here nor there.

He recommends three different styles to use during this “conversation”

1. The Hail Mary
2. The Asshole Method
3. The Wild Card Method

I guess it doesn’t occur to this guy that all would fall under The Asshole Method.  The Hail Mary method is to be used on a “girlfriend” or “long-term booty call”.  I guess another term for the hook-up that is so common on college campuses these days.   You play Mr. Nice Guy and tell the woman that you want to have children with her “one day”, but that day isn’t quite here yet.  You know you have career and financial goals and that having a baby today would mess those up.  You can’t support her or that child in the way you would like.  Oh, and I can’t leave out you are instructed to dump the girl after this, because if she happens to get pregnant again, you won’t be able to use this a second time.   I guess if you are already doing well in those departments you are screwed and then have to move on to the next method of being a total jerk.    Just tell her you will not be part of this child’s life and she will only get financial support that court forces him to pay.  But in no uncertain terms will you forced into a fatherhood to a child that you don’t want.  I guess you are effectively breaking it off here as well.

The third one really is the most charming of all the methods.  I will let him describe it to you.

How The Wildcard Method Works

Think about what causes normal couples wanting to have children to get an abortion. If an ultrasound finds that the child has a developmental problem like autism, many couples choose to abort. You can use this knowledge to your advantage because you can tell the girl that a rare genetic disease is common in your family. You should tell her you would love to have children but it would be unfair to risk the possibility of this disease (ideally use one which causes an early death and/or horrible lifestyle conditions while alive) being passed on to future generations. To add color to your story, bring up a nonexistent sibling and tell her that you are still recovering from their painful passing a few years ago.

To help convince her that this is a family disease, take pictures. This might require you to spend an afternoon volunteering at a hospital or center for developmentally disabled people. Take a picture of someone who could pass as a relative (similar skin tone is probably all you need). This is just an example, but do whatever you think is necessary to sell the seriousness of this genetic disease to her.  Explain that having a kid with your DNA would be like playing Russian roulette with someone’s life. If she is still on the fence have her watch the film Tiptoes with Matthew McConaughey and tell her what your siblings, uncles, cousins have lived through makes dwarfism seem like a walk in the park. While this method could require some acting on your part, if you sell it well enough she will be offering to pay for the abortion.

Apparently it would seem this would work best on a woman who has yet to meet your family, or at the very least doesn’t know them very well since she has no idea that you lost a sibling.  It also never occurs to this wonderful guy that the woman may ask if he has this going on why he wouldn’t have a vasectomy to be sure he never plants his seed, but you know, details.  I love how something so rare is so common all that the same time, don’t you?

Is really necessary to wonder why dont’ view life as valuable anymore?   I will give him credit though, he does seem to think it is his repsonsibility to pay for the abortion.  I guess we should take some solace in that.

 

No, I Won’t Marry You. You Look Like a Tramp

Well those aren’t the exact words the Pastor used, but yes, he told a bride that her dress was too sexy for the church service.  He requested that she cover up her breast area and add some length to her dress and then he would happily marry the couple.

The wedding was due to take place at The Truth Ministries Holiness Church in Houston on August 10.  Both the bride and groom arrived at the church one hour prior to when the service was due to start.  When the Pastor greeted the family he noticed the bride’s dress (or lack thereof) and asked her to make her self look more appropriate for his church.

Below is a picture of the dress (from the website of the retailer, not the actual bride).  I would have to say that I wouldn’t think about wearing that dress to a church let alone as my wedding gown.  But to each their own I guess.

Now one must keep in mind that neither the bride or groom were members of the church.  So it is likely they didn’t understand the standards of the church.  Every church has its own unique way of doing things and has standards that members either agree with or you find another house of worship.

I understand that the families, the wedding party, and the guests are very upset at how it turned out.  They had a reception planned and were not married and most likely not in the mood to party after what was a very embarrassing moment for the bride.

Didn’t she take someone shopping with her when she picked out the dress?  Or at very least show it to someone beforehand?  Didn’t her family or friends mention this isn’t the type of dress you normally get married in?  I would think someone would have mentioned that maybe a church wouldn’t find this appropriate.

Was the Pastor correct in standing by his principles and not marrying the couple?  I would think so.

RTR Here.

Tawana Brawley Finally Paying her Comeuppance

Tawana Brawley, the woman who falsely accused various men of holding her captive, raping her, then leaving her in a trash bag with racial slurs scrawled across her body has had her wages garnished in what is due to one of the men she accused.  Steven Pagones has been waiting years and years for the payments on the settlement he was given, more than $400,000.  You may recall this is the case that helped make Al Sharpton a household name when he came to her defense after she accused all white men of rape.

Sharpton staged sit-ins and rallies in order to see “justice” done in this case.  Police could find no evidence to file charges, but of course that didn’t stop the race baiting Sharpton from pushing the issue.  Once it reached a grand jury they found no evidence to back up her claims.  The story goes that she stayed away from home for several days and couldn’t find a reasonable excuse that her parents would believe and came up with this story.  While it does seem to be the case that her mother’s boyfriend was a violent man who reportedly had beat her in the past, it still doesn’t justify ruining the lives of innocent men.

Brawley showed no signs of rape or of hypothermia immediately after being found in a trash bag.  Brawley had no cuts, no abrasions, or virtually any other injuries at all.  It has even been reported that the hospital noted that her teeth had been recently brushed.  Hardly indicative of a person being held captive in the woods for days.  One neighbor says she saw Brawley crawl into the trash bag on her own accord and last but not least, all the writing found on her was written upside down.

To tell you the truth this isn’t even good enough.  It is mind numbing to me that she was never prosecuted for bring false charges.  In my opinion every woman who brings false claims of rape should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

What Brawley allowed to happen was even bigger than the men who were falsely accused, it brought a city; and a nation for that matter, to a racial divide that was totally unnecessary as well as potentiality dangerous.

This is the first time that Brawley has had to pay in any way for what she had done.  It is long since time that paid for her crime and her dishonesty.

My Brilliant and Gifted 28-Year-Old Lives in My Basement

Another Blogger and radio host Matt Walsh received a letter from a listener.  It was from a father that feels that Matt is a “right winged extremist” for thinking his children should do chores, and eventually get a job when they are teens.

“Matt, I heard your horrible conversation today about parenting. A few comments in response:

1) Based on your remarks, I have to say I feel bad for your kids. You sound like the sort of person who never should have been a parent. You said you plain to teach your kids “how to think.” I guess this is common in right wing religious fundamentalist households. Personally, I let my child form his own conclusions about things. To impose your views on a child is tantamount to child abuse. Do them a favor, let them think FREELY.

2) You greatly exaggerate the importance of “chores.” Also, the idea that a kid should be forced to “get a job” is abhorrent. My son was very gifted so we gave him all the tools to succeed academically. This meant we didn’t turn him into slave labor and we certainly didn’t tell him he needed to go work behind a cash register. He concentrated on his school work, and we did our job as parents and financially supported him.

3) It’s easy to mock a “30 year old who lives with is parents.” My son is almost 29 and he’s been home with us since he graduated. Unfortunately the job market isn’t the greatest (maybe you hadn’t heard) and I’m not going to let him starve on the street. He has a college education, it’s pointless for him to be out working in a retail store or some other menial job. I will be here for him until he is able to get the job he deserves.

You need to grow up, get some life experiences and then maybe you’ll have the right to sermonize about parenting.

-Nick”

Just a thought here, if Nick Jr. were so gifted wouldn’t he have been able to figure out how to make a living even in a bad economy?  This reminds me of a story.  About a month ago I went out with my best friend’s mother.  The event we went to was being held in the local VFW.  I was sitting at a table waiting for the event to get started.  While I was waiting this man came over and introduced himself.  For whatever reason he started telling me his life story.  He is in his 80’s.  He was telling me that when he was a young man his father forced him to get a job and would take most of his pay for rent.  He promised himself that he would never do that to his children.  He goes on to tell me that he never charged a dime in rent to any of his three children.  He then went on and told me that his 47-year-old son was still living at home and never paid rent.  He told me this story like it was a good thing.  I asked if his son was married?  He told me that his son had problems finding a “good woman”.  Hmm, is the fact that he is middle-aged and has never had any sense of caring for himself be part of the reason?

I wasn’t rude and didn’t say anything to the man.  He believes that he has done his children a favor.  I happen to disagree.  I think it important to teach children a sense of responsibility.  I was having another conversation with another older gentleman he knows and he told me that he and his wife were having a conversation a few weeks ago and they have come to the realization that they never let their children grow up.  They did so much for them that they are constantly having problems in their lives when it comes to taking responsibility.  I am not at all surprised.

Of course, as a parent, you should help your children when they are in trouble.  If they hit hard times while an adult, sure let them move in and help them out until the get back on their feet.  If you can afford it, throw them a little rent money if they need it.  But to be the only support system for them is not helping them.  It more than likely is hurting them.

In the case of Nick, Jr, how does he date or even just go out with the friends if he has no income?  Are they also supporting his personal life?  I would think a man of that age wants to leave the house on occasion.  Does he have a car?  If so, who pays for that?  That would require insurance, gas, and the occasional repair, would it not?  What if he wants to go out for wings and a beer to watch Monday Night Football?

We are raising a generation of people who can’t help themselves.  How exactly are they going to govern this country when their time inevitability comes?  A very terrifying thought.

Here is Matt’s response to Nick.  It is a little meaner than I would ever be, but it is classic all the same:

Dear Nick,

1) Tell you what. How ’bout I blindfold you, drive you out into the middle of the desert at night, and then leave you there without a map or a GPS? It’ll be great. You can just travel FREELY. After all, who am I to bring you to this place and then presume to tell you how to navigate? I’m just the guy that kidnapped you and dumped you into a hostile, cold wilderness. It would be presumptuous and authoritative of me to offer you direction and guidance. So I’ll let you wander around aimlessly until you collapse exhausted in a ditch, and are eaten slowly by wild scavengers. You’re welcome. I mean, I assume you’ll be grateful. I’ll merely be applying your parenting technique to the situation.

By the way, did you ever tell your kid not to play in the street? Did you instruct him about the dangers of hot stoves and fallen electrical wires? This is a quandary. See, if you imposed your anti-high voltage power line views on your kid, then apparently you’re guilty of abuse by your standards. However, if you didn’t, you’re guilty of reprehensible neglect by the standards of civilized human beings. I’m not an expert on parenting. I never claimed to be. But you don’t need to be an expert to know that one of the fundamental tasks of a parent — and this really speaks to the whole point of the endeavor — is to teach your child how to navigate the physical, moral, spiritual and intellectual dangers of life. This includes teaching them how to think, which could also be referred to as passing on your values and your worldview. If you have no interest in doing this, then I would suggest that you never really wanted a child — you wanted a friend. Now you have one. Living at home with you. Forever. Congratulations.

2) Chores schmores. What can they teach a kid? Discipline, obedience, and hard work? Screw that. What is this, the 50′s? Listen, Nick, don’t take this the wrong way, but what leads you to the conclusion that your son is “gifted”? He can’t mow the lawn, work a job, earn a living, pay a bill, apply a skill, or support himself, yet he’s “gifted”? What are his gifts, exactly? You know, something tells me an astronaut’s parents never have to inform people that their child is “gifted.” People sort of pick up on that based on context clues. They behold his accomplishments and admire his achievements. They can SEE his gifts. He uses them, applies them, refines them. Your son MIGHT have gifts — the jury is still out — but whatever they may be, they’ll atrophy and whittle away the longer he spends lounging in a bean bag chair eating macaroni and cheese.

3) So your brilliant and gifted 29 year old son would “starve” if he was forced to take care of himself? The “gifted” standard is getting lower by the day, isn’t it? I’ve been living independently and taking care of myself since before I could legally drink a Heineken. I guess that makes me a Nobel candidate — if your helpless grown adult son gets to set the bar for “gifted.”

The kind of oblivious snobbery you display used to be reserved for classes of nobility and royalty. Now, any drooling schlub who spent 4 years getting drunk and fornicating at college can claim to be “too good” for almost every available job. Your son isn’t above anyone. He certainly isn’t superior to hard working cashiers and retail clerks who support themselves, raise families and live full lives, as your little snowflake hides under his bed while mommy makes him hot cocoa and tells him he’s special.

News flash, Nick: Junior ain’t special. He graduated school, good for him. Anyone can do that if they’ve got money, time and no pressures or responsibilities from the outside world. Your little pumpkin doesn’t “deserve” a job. I wouldn’t hire him to dig a ditch, much less take on serious responsibilities of any kind. You can spend your whole life telling everyone what you and your son deserve, meanwhile the rest of us will be out in the world, earning, striving, accomplishing, living.

Nick, it’s somewhat peculiar that you chose to end your email by chastising me for not having “life experiences.” I’m two years younger than Nick Jr and I’m married with two kids. I’ve got a career in broadcasting and goals for the future that I’m steadily working toward achieving. I’m not exactly at the point where I’ve got enough material to write my memoirs, but I’ll get there one day. In any case, you, my friend, need to take that “life experiences” lecture and bring it home to the pudgy couch potato sleeping in your basement.

Thanks for the email.

God speed,

Matt

Here’s a Nominee for Mom of the Year

A woman has decided that her smart, but socially awkward son needs to get some to get over his shyness.  She places this ad on Craigslist to find someone to take his virginity.

I am sure that any mom worries about a child that is shy.  It is hard to know that your child isn’t getting all the great things that come with having friendships and even dating.  But isn’t this pushing it a little too far?  Having sex isn’t going to magically make his shyness go away nor will it necessarily give him courage.  He may very well fall very hard for the first person that he is intimate with and end up with a badly broken heart.  He may have very well made a decision that he wants to be really in love the first time he is intimate with someone and he doesn’t feel comfortable sharing that decision with his mother.

What if her son just doesn’t want to be seduced?  What is this young woman supposed to do, force him?

This is allegedly a kid that has a bright future in front of him after graduating from one from a university that is considered to be one of the top in the nation.  Shouldn’t his education take top priority?  After all he has plenty of time to date and socialize.

One can hope that this is some sort of fake.

UPenn and the Hook-Up Culture

About a week ago I came across this article from The New York Times on the hook-up culture on the campus of Penn.  It is a very long article and very sad.  This article epitomizes why “feminism” is horrible for women in particular and society in general.

“We don’t really like each other in person, sober. We literally can’t sit down and have coffee.”

Says a young, obviously intelligent young woman who is only known as A.  You can’t sit down and have a conversation with this young man but you can take off your clothes and share the most important thing that you have, your body.  There is no emotional connection whatsoever, it is just scratching an itch.  It seems the reality that you are putting yourself in a position for unplanned pregnancies that likely end in abortion as well as STD’s doesn’t even enter into the equation.

One of the things that makes us human is our emotion.  But it seems that in order to be part of the whole feminist movement that is something that you need to put aside in order to achieve your goals.  What is the point of achieving anything if it costs you the most basic part of your humanity?

Instead, she enjoyed casual sex on her terms — often late at night, after a few drinks, and never at her place, she noted, because then she would have to wash the sheets.

Heaven forbid you have to wash the sheets.  I mean, doesn’t she have to wash the sheets at some point anyway?

Increasingly, she said, many privileged young people see college as a unique life stage in which they don’t — and shouldn’t — have obligations other than their own self-development.

While it is perfectly understandable that someone would want to take some time and figure out where they fit in the world, it seems that becomes the only thing that really matters.  Is that where we want to young women to head?  There are many people out there that for whatever the reasons, don’t want to be married.  That is fine and it is a personal choice.  But the underside of this behavior is that you never learn how to bond to someone, everything becomes disposable.  Doesn’t that make it that much harder to make a marriage work?  Marriage is different things to different people.  Each couple has to find their own way and figure out works for them.  But there is no way around this, marriage is a series of compromises.  You can’t have what you want when you want it 100% of the time and expect that marriage to work.  Sometimes your spouse is given a great job offer that requires to you and your family to relocate.  Sometimes you need to get your children into a better school system, sometimes extended family will need assistance that requires you to make some changes to your everyday lives.  These things are going to happen over a period of a marriage and weighing those choices isn’t always easy, but is necessary in order to make the relationship work.  It won’t always be about you.  That is just how it is.

“I don’t want to go through those changes with you. I want you to have changed and become enough of your own person so that when you meet me, we can have a stable life and be very happy.”

Her youth and inexperience is showing.  As you age, your ability to be flexible gets harder not easier.  As I said, marriage is a series of compromises.  The older you get the less likely you are to make those compromises.

“I’m a true feminist,” she added. “I’m a strong woman. I know what I want.”

At the same time, she didn’t want the number of people she had slept with printed, and she said it was important to her to keep her sexual life separate from her image as a leader at Penn.

“Ten years from now, no one will remember — I will not remember — who I have slept with,” A. said. “But I will remember, like, my transcript, because it’s still there. I will remember what I did. I will remember my accomplishments and places my name is hung on campus.”

Really?

A friend of hers, who attended a nearby college and did have a serious boyfriend, said that she felt as if she were breaking a social taboo. “Am I allowed to find the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with when I’m 19?” she said. “I don’t really know. It feels like I’m not.”

How sad is it that young women today are made to feel that they are bad people because they are choosing love?

Another young woman who arrived on campus a virgin says:

“It’s kind of like a spiral,” she said. “The girls adapt a little bit, because they stop expecting that they’re going to get a boyfriend — because if that’s all you’re trying to do, you’re going to be miserable. But at the same time, they want to, like, have contact with guys.” So they hook up and “try not to get attached.”

Now, she said, she and her best friend had changed their romantic goals, from finding boyfriends to finding “hookup buddies,” which she described as “a guy that we don’t actually really like his personality, but we think is really attractive and hot and good in bed.”

One of the points of the article is that young women are driving the hook-up culture because they are strong young women who know what they want.  But do they?  Or have they just accepted that this is reality and stopped looking  for anything else?

The hook-up culture that seems to be fueled by alcohol also puts young women in the position to be sexually assaulted at higher rates.

“You go in, and they take you down to a dark basement,” Haley, a blond, pink-cheeked senior, recalled of her first frat parties in freshman year. “There’s girls dancing in the middle, and there’s guys lurking on the sides and then coming and basically pressing their genitals up against you and trying to dance.”

Dancing like that felt good but dirty, and like a number of girls, Haley said she had to be drunk in order to enjoy it. Women said universally that hookups could not exist without alcohol, because they were for the most part too uncomfortable to pair off with men they did not know well without being drunk. One girl, explaining why her encounters freshman and sophomore year often ended with fellatio, said that usually by the time she got back to a guy’s room, she was starting to sober up and didn’t want to be there anymore, and giving the guy oral sex was an easy way to wrap things up and leave.

Well doesn’t that sound empowering?  I know that is how I want my sexual experiences to be.

In November of Haley’s freshman year, a couple of months after her first tentative “Difmos,” or dance-floor makeouts, she went to a party with a boy from her floor. She had too much to drink, and she remembered telling him that she wanted to go home.

Instead, she said, he took her to his room and had sex with her while she drifted in and out of consciousness. She woke up with her head spinning. The next day, not sure what to think about what had happened, she described the night to her friends as though it were a funny story: I was so drunk, I fell asleep while I was having sex! She played up the moment in the middle of the night when the guy’s roommate poked his head in the room and asked, “Yo, did you score?”

Only later did Haley begin to think of what had happened as rape — a disturbingly common part of many women’s college experience. In a 2007 survey funded by the Justice Department of 6,800 undergraduates at two big public universities, nearly 14 percent of women said they had been victims of at least one completed sexual assault at college; more than half of the victims said they were incapacitated from drugs or alcohol at the time.

The close relationship between hooking up and drinking leads to confusion and disagreement about the line between a “bad hookup” and assault. In 2009, 2010 and 2011, 10 to 16 forcible sex offenses were reported annually to campus security as taking place on Penn’s campus or in the immediate neighborhood.

Sadly many of the young women in this study said that there were following the advice given to them by their moms.  This is what moms want for their daughters?  That is nothing short of tragic.  I know I wouldn’t want my daughter treated that way.

Paula England, a sociologist at New York University, who led an online survey of 24,000 students at 21 universities called the Online College Social Life Survey, said that women tended to fare much better sexually in relationships than in hookups.

“Guys don’t seem to care as much about women’s pleasure in the hookup, whereas they do seem to care quite a bit in the relationships,” Dr. England said. By contrast, women “seem to have this idea they’re supposed to be pleasing in both contexts.” In hookups, women were much more likely to give men oral sex than to receive it.

Part of the reason men aren’t as focused on pleasing women in hookups, Dr. England said, is the lingering sexual double standard, which sometimes causes men to disrespect women precisely for hooking up with them.

There is judgment from other women, too — two women said they had been rejected from sororities because of their sexual reputations. And technology has made it easier to spread gossip. One woman recalled a guy showing her an e-mail he had received on his fraternity Listserv, in which another guy described having sex with a girl in the bathroom at a club.

“They’re not afraid to use names,” she said of the men, adding, “I’m sure there’s been a story about me on a Listserv. It happens to everyone.”

Just lovely huh?  It happens to everyone?  It has never happened to me nor will it.  I don’t give young men a pass in this by any stretch of the imagination.  But this also has become part of the culture today to the point that men have also been conditioned to believe that this behavior is normal and “empowering”, so hey why not.  I hear from feminists all the time that we should be teaching young men to not rape.  Shouldn’t we also be teaching young women not to get to drunk and put yourself in the position that when you don’t have your full capacities that these things are more likely to happen?  Of course men shouldn’t sexually assault women, that is a given.  But we also need to tell young women the dangers of their actions.

But there is some good news:

For all the focus on hookups, campuses are not sexual free-for-alls, at Penn or elsewhere. At colleges nationally, by senior year, 4 in 10 students are either virgins or have had intercourse with only one person, according to the Online College Social Life Survey. Nearly 3 in 10 said that they had never had a hookup in college. Meanwhile, 20 percent of women and a quarter of men said they had hooked up with 10 or more people.

According to one young woman who comes from a less privileged background has this to say:

Mercedes, a junior at Penn who is on financial aid, said that at her mostly Latino public high school in California, it was the troubled and unmotivated students who drank and hooked up, while the honors students who wanted to go to college kept away from those things.

When she went to Penn, she was surprised to see her elite classmates drinking, but even more surprised by the casual making out. She would go along with her friends to fraternity parties, but she refused to dance with strangers or to kiss anyone.

“Sharing that side of myself with a stranger just seems very strange to me,” she said in September. “I mean, if you break it down, it’s a very strange thing to do.”

Another young woman:

In Catherine’s view, her classmates tried very hard to separate sex from emotion, because they believed that getting too attached to someone would interfere with their work. They saw a woman’s marrying young as either proof of a lack of ambition or a tragic mistake that would stunt her career.

But Catherine noted that a handful of young women are starting to question that idea. In an article on Slate titled “Marry Young,” the writer Julia Shaw, who married at 23, said her generation was missing out on the support that young couples could provide each other as they faced the challenges of early adulthood.

“Marriage wasn’t something we did after we’d grown up, it was how we have grown up and grown together,” she wrote of herself and her husband.

As a teenager, Catherine had thought she would wait to get married until her late 20s or early 30s. But her college experiences had made her think that she would rather marry young than throw away a good relationship because it wasn’t the right time.

That might mean having to pass up certain career opportunities, for geographic reasons. But Catherine thought that her peers underestimated how hard it was to find the right person to be with — as hard, perhaps, as finding the right job.

“People kind of discount” how “difficult it is to find someone that you even remotely like, let alone really fall for,” she said. “And losing that can be just as impractical and harmful to yourself, if not more so, than missing out on a job or something like that. What else do you really have at the end of your life?”

If behaving like you don’t have emotion is the way to be a good “feminist”, I pass.

Slippery Slope of Liberalism Part 9

So many mistreated babies and kids with Downs live terrible lives. Instead of throwing resources at a nonviable fetus, why can’t the church help children with Down syndrome that are already alive? Because anti-abortion folks care more about fetuses with fairytale narratives than actual babies.

So says Katie Baker of Jezebel.  She is unhappy about the Down’s Syndrome baby that isn’t going to be aborted but instead adopted because a Catholic priest decided to try to give the birth parents another alternative besides abortion.

It is any wonder that people are disgusted by the sometime rabid views of pro-abortion crowd?  Simply because a child has Down’s Syndrome, it is called a “nonviable” fetus.  How exactly is this “fetus” nonviable?  This child is going to a set of parents that not only willing to do the extra work that a special needs child requires, they want to do it.  They made a choice to raise this child.  They have their eyes wide open as they went out of their way to make a choice to raise this child.

So you see abortion isn’t really about choice, because the birth parents and the adoptive parents have the made the “choice” to give this child life and yet they are still being called wrong and being ridiculed.  It is about weeding out the weakest amongst us.  A child with special needs can’t possibly have anything to offer the world, so kill them.  It isn’t enough that the vast majority of babies who are diagnosed are killed through abortion.  Apparently they won’t be happy until the 92% actually becomes 100%.

What this author also doesn’t seem to understand is how much work that Catholic church does, not just in America, but worldwide to try to stop suffering.  All over this country you will find food banks, homeless shelters, clothing drives, and the like as outreach to the poor. One of the things that Catholic Charities excels at is hard to place adoptions.  They are able to find homes for children that state has given up on and normally will be housed in a state-run facility.  They want all children to have a healthy and happy environment.  I have a friend who adopted through Catholic charities, the mother became pregnant again.  They were contacted and asked if they wanted to raise their son’s sibling.  They do everything they can to try to keep families together, give to the poor, and help the downtrodden.  But I guess since it isn’t a government program it is no good.